if you say yes to me [entries|friends|calendar] jenni And so it is, Just like you said it should be. We'll both forget the breeze Most of the time. And so it is, The colder water, The blower's daughter, The pupil in denial. [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

another year to see if we can get things right.. [Sunday, December 31st @ 5:09pm] [ mood | cheerful ] take what you've got and don't hold back, make these next months worth remembering sooo.. a new year starts tonight. my winter break has been nothing of what i expected, but life is funny like that sometimes. i'm not even gonna sit here and try to reflect on this past year.. it has been both good & bad. i've made awesome friends at my new school & lost quite a few at my old.. i got my heart broken again & broke a few hearts. i've made my mistakes, but of course learned from them. so all that i can say is i hope this year is better than the last :] out to the bar with corey & his friends tonight for the third night in a row :] he's amazing.. everyone have a safe & happy new year!!!! ♥ Cmnt

[Monday, December 25th @ 6:26pm] just so you know, what you're doing is not impressing me. it's actually making me sick. in other newsss... merry christmas everyone :) tomorrow is gonna be the start of a very hard road, but i'm optimistic.. ♥ Cmnt

[Sunday, December 24th @ 1:13am] [ mood | giddy ] this is the start of something good ♥ Cmnt

DIE YOUNG AND SAVE YOURSELF [Monday, November 27th @ 4:35pm] [ mood | amused ] to the biggest motherfucking pussy i know, Don't apologize - I hope you choke and die Search your shelf for something which to hang yourself So is that what you call a getaway? Tell me what you got away with Cause I've seen more spine in jellyfish I've seen more guts in eleven-year-old kids Have another drink and drive yourself home I hope there's ice on all the roads And you cna think of me when you forget your seatbelt and again when your head goes through the windshield! love, meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee P.S. Revenge is coming soon. I hope you enjoy it, cause it's gonna be sweeeeeeeeeeet. ;) Cmnt

ure the only song i wanna hear -- <3 [Tuesday, November 21st @ 7:50pm] [ mood | bored ] life hasn't been treating me very nicely lately. just every aspect of it. hopefully it will get better soon. it usually does. i was so mean to brian yesterday, and sadly i don't even care. and i pretty much meant everything i said. he just put me through so much shit, and i feel so bitter about the relationship we had. it's gonna take me a long time to forget. i get to go home tomorrow for thanksgiving, which is good but then i have to come back this weekend for work = not good. i'm gonna quit there as soon as i start at my other job, which might take a few weeks. the only happiness i've been feeling lately is when i'm with my friends; which so isn't me. i can't wait to get myself back again.. for now, i'm hanging in there <3 Cmnt

[Tuesday, November 21st @ 1:52am] i could not be more dissapointed with life right now. Cmnt

[Thursday, November 16th @ 1:21am] [ mood | gloomy ] and so it hits me. Cmnt

i want a perfect body // i want a perfect soul.. [Friday, November 10th @ 1:32pm] [ mood | amused ] [ music | another one goes by - the walkmen ] basically , i'm in love with my life right now. i broke up with brian which is sad but true - something i reallllly needed to do. i knew it for awhile, but i was just too scared of the outcome. i know he loved me a lot, but he never showed it, until mayyybe at the very end when all he was doing was trying to save the relationship. i definitely shouldn't have put myself through all the shit that i did, for as long as i did. everyone was telling me.. but i'm pretty stubborn and just had to see for myself. so now, every little stupid silly thing that i asked and begged him to do when we were together, he is doing now. i hope it's not so he thinks that i'll take him back. because whatever it is that we had is definitely gone. but i hope he realizes that i'm not his life, and i never was. and i know he'll do fine without me.. he just needs to get his life back, the one he had before we were together, the one i've been wanting him to show me all this time. school is great.. still hard, but its getting better. i have a new roommate and we get along so wellll. i love my friendss. i'm 21 now, and just enjoying life. and i met a new guy, who is superr sweet and fun. but i'm not letting anyone or anything hold me back anymore. and it's wonderful. :) Cmnt

its like u get homesick for a place that doesn't exist [Sunday, October 8th @ 8:58pm] [ mood | annoyed ] [ music | Amber Pacific - The Last time ] Everything I believe And everything that holds me together at the seams Seems so far away from here And we're all wondering Where we're going & I wish my colors weren't so faded &I wish I didn't feel so cold Everyone's so slow and jaded Falling asleep to this Midwestern drone another crazy busy week coming upon me. hopefully i'll be able to balance so much schoolwork and working til like 1am in atlantic city 4-5 days a week. i can't believe i've only been here for a month. i feel like i need a break already. it sounds crazy but i miss my brother at times like these; i need an overprotective father figure to let me know that everything's gonna be alright. i used to be able to talk to my mom about anything, but she's so judgemental lately. and i miss my lady darlene at my old job. every day i went into work and no matter how bad my day was or how depressed i was, i could go in there and her face would light up when i walked in the room and i was the only one that could make her smile. it made me feel like i was changing the world just by seeing her smile. i really fell in love with that lady. i'm gonna try to write to her daughter soon and she how she is doing. and me & brian haven't been doing so great lately. i feel like everything's changing and i can't control any of it. and wish my dumbass roommate would turn off the fucking spanish channel. :/ 001 ; Cmnt

la la la la la la la la . [Thursday, September 14th @ 4:42am] i LOVEEEEEEE my boyfriend!!!! he is AMAZING ♥ more details entry laterrrrrrrr :) 002 ; Cmnt

let's get it on tonight [Monday, June 5th @ 12:37pm] post anything that you want, and post it anonymously. anything you'd like. post twice if you so desire. then, put this in your livejournal to see what your friends (and perhaps others who you don't even realize read your livejournal) have to say. Post for fun, Post for kicks, post anonomously or make sure I know who you are, doesn't matter, just do it . it's fun !! 003 ; Cmnt

u've got this silly way of keeping me on the edge of my seat [Monday, May 29th @ 11:10pm] [ mood | stressed ] so the only good thing about today was that i got paid time and a half. but of course EVERYTHING went wrong. my glasses are MIA so i drove to work in lotsssss of traffic, practically blind. as soon as i walked into work, i got a headache. there was a slight fire, so we had to carry everyone out. then bring everyone back in. then the elevator was broken so we had to CARRY all the fat asses UP STAIRS to their apartments. oh, that was such a good time. than, i was taking care of someone and she flew backwards on her ass and her walker hit her right in the face. oh man. then one of the care managers got accused for raping someone. again. fucking sick. he better get fired this time. he pretty much deserves to die. tomorrow i have to work 16 hours starting at 545 but i have to wash my stupid work clothes. then i'm going to bed. and no one probably wants to hear about my amazing day with old people. but fuck you because old people rock :D ♥ here's a quote from my favorite movie just because its the fucking best. DORY: No. No, you can't... STOP. Please don't go away. Please? No one's ever stuck with me for so long before. And if you leave... if you leave... I just, I remember things better with you. I do, look. P. Sherman, forty-two... forty-two... I remember it, I do. It's there, I know it is, because when I look at you, I can feel it. And-and I look at you, and I... and I'm home. Please... I don't want that to go away. I don't want to forget. -finding nemo P.S. i love my geeeek <3 Cmnt

i'd rather rest forever in your arms. [Sunday, May 28th @ 10:34pm] [ mood | bitchy ] [ music | the veronicas - forever ] errr. i feel like poop. it's hot as hell & my mom refuses to turn on the air conditioner. i need a new job. but i got way too attached to the people there. i should probably just stop being a baby. and move on. maybe i'll start looking this week. plus i still haven't figured out how im gonna pay my lawyer this week. so, last night me and alyce talked at the west chester diner for like 3 hours. just about everything. i love that girl. but her answer to absolutely everything is God. if i put all my worries in His hands, all my problems will go away and if i just go to church with her, i will realize that there's certain things in my life i don't need because God is all i need. i mean, i believe in trusting God with your life/problems and all, but right now i don't feel like He could be my answer to everything. i probably shouldn't feel that way. in other news, livejournal is pretty ghey & i have no idea why i still write in this thing. Cmnt

won't u kiss me on that midnight street .. [Tuesday, May 23rd @ 2:03am] days like today should happen more often. & that is ALL i have to say because i am tired as hell. goooooooooooooooodniteeeeeeeeeeee :) 002 ; Cmnt

i traded my conscience for your CONFIDENCE [Friday, May 19th @ 9:43pm] JB. loveyou&missyousomuchithurtslikehell. ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ Your time has already come and I don't know why The last thing that I had heard you were doin' just fine It seems like just yesterday I was laughing with you Playing games at Grandma's house well you taught me well, didn't you? I hope I'm just like you Do they have radios in heaven? I hope they do 'Cause they're playing my song on the radio And I'm singing it to you You left before I had a chance to say goodbye But that's the way life usually is it just passes you by But you can't hold on to regrets and you can't look back So I'll just be thankful for the times that I had with you I hope I'm just like you Do they have radios in heaven? I hope they do 'Cause they're playing my song on the radio And I'm singing it to you If they don't have radios in heaven here's what I'll do I can bring my guitar when my time is up and I'll play it for you Tell me can you hear me now if not, then I can try to sing real loud What's it like up on the other side of the clouds? I hope I'm just like you I hope I turn out to be as good as you 001 ; Cmnt

this is the price you pay for loss of control [Thursday, May 18th @ 4:16pm] [ mood | calm ] hmmm, my mom can be soo fucking judgemental sometimes. she just reamed me out for no reason whatsoever. umm hun, did u just throw up in the bathroom? fuck you, just because i eat a lot and im skinny doesn't mean im bulimic. grrrrrrrrr. anyway, i got my court date in the mail. in order to not have my insurance drop me and get reckless driving on my license, i have to hire an attorney, which is gonna be like $800. nooo clue how that's gonna work out. in other news, tomorrow's my brother's birthday. hopefully i work a double tomorrow so i can just consume myself in other work and not think about how much i miss him and how things would be so different if he were still here. i think in a few weeks i'm gonna join back at the gym that i went to last summer. last night i did like 300 sit ups and ran a mile. running for me is such therapy. it gets out my anger and makes me realize so much. i just gotta be careful not to fuck up my knee even more. PLUS, since i stopped working out i'm like blaaahh. and my body isn't all toned n stuff like it used to be, especially when i was training. i'm gonna get it back though!! so last night i realized that i let the little things get the best of me, and sometimes i need to just chill out and let things work themselves out. cause it's not worth me getting all worked up over. and i'm kinda embarassed by the way i've been acting lately. but fuck it, i'm human. ok i'm outtttttttt ♥ Cmnt

i hate that i'm so into you [Tuesday, May 16th @ 11:33am] i really don't understand myself, so i can't expect anyone else to. Now here's the good part, so you listen close, what I choose, is you. You're who I want to wake up with and go to bed with and do everything in between with. I get a choice now. I get to choose. I choose you. -Grey's Anatomy Finale [ amaazing ] 001 ; Cmnt

knock 3 times on the ceiling if you want me [Monday, May 15th @ 9:37pm] [ mood | lazy ] [ music | The Spill Canvas - Lust A Prima Vista ] my mother tried to "talk" to me today. she says i'm not myself and she would like to know what's going on in my life that i'm not telling her. i told her i didn't wanna talk about anything, then she got mad when it seemed like she was talking to a brick wall. surges of unbelievable happiness, accompanied by a sudden feeling of hopelessness and worthlessness. anyone who has taken basic psychology should be able to figure this out. something else to complicate my already complicated life. however, i'm trying to keep a happy medium. whatever that may be. 003 ; Cmnt

i hope there's ice on all the roads [Monday, May 15th @ 12:17am] [ mood | sick ] i just don't know what to think anymore. there comes a point where i just .. can't .. possibly .. take any more pain. on another note, i wanna trust you i really, really do. but you have to prove it to me. don't lie to me or omit certain things, because that's lying too. all i want is to be treated with respect. i don't think that's too much to ask. and oh yeah, please try not to break my heart anymore. it's really wearing on me. like i said before, i shouldn't get my hopes up about things. what if all my hopes/dreams/goals come crashing down? what do i have then? that's right, nothing. i'm probably going to call out of work tomorrow so i can go to the doctors. i don't really feel like i can face the world anymore. Cmnt

because i have to.. [Saturday, May 13th @ 6:33pm] 1. I'll respond with something random about you 2. I'll challenge you to try something 3. I'll pick a color that I associate with you 4. I'll tell you something I like about you 5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you 6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of 7. I'll ask you something I've always wanted to ask you 8. If I do this for you, you must post this on yours 008 ; Cmnt

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